Adults say the darndest things
One thing that I did not anticipate as an adoptive mother is the questions and comments made by (hopefully) well-meaning adults. I expected the “is that your mom?” addressed by my biracial children’s peers about me, their Caucasian mother. But adults? Really? I have been asked “does he ever see his mother?” (every morning when I wake him up and every night when I put him to bed).” How many of them are yours? ” (All of them, biological and adopted). “How many are your own?” (once again, ALL of them). The most comment shocking to me was while waiting at a check-out at a store with my daughter, who is obviously darker than me (but could still be my biological child) and in a wheelchair. A priest came up to us and said, right in front of my daughter, “you will go straight to Heaven for adopting her”. I was shocked beyond belief! My daughter is not hard of hearing or mentally retarded, no matter what assumptions one might make due to her physical disability. She has feelings! And if you saw my husband and me together, you would probably assume that she is our biological child. However, I knew that his remark was well-meaning, no matter how it came out. So I politely responded “Look at her smile. I have my Heaven right here on earth”. I then turned my attention to my beautiful daughter. Because when I am with her, in spite of any challenges, it does feel like my own little slice of Heaven!